Ok, I think I have been in shock all week. I have been thinking non-stop about the whole ciggie cost thing. OMG! I feel like a fucking junky who know's where her next fix is but doesn't have anything to left pawn. Kinda sounds like "rock bottom" but there is no rocky bottom in the river D'Nile!! Instead, I shouted out to all my dealers (fag ash lil friends) to find out the low down on who's going to the Indian Reservation? North Carolina? South of the Border? And how many cartons can I get? Oh, oh, and can I use my coupons! My friend B is not only going to keep my up to date on the cig runs (brings Christopher Multisante to mind!) but we are going to start "walking" a few days aweek and have promised ourselves NOT to smoke while we walk.......baby steps, baby steps!
Then wait.........yes, believe it or not, I had a MoMeNt of clarity!. Why not just take advantage of this crisis to QUIT.
I tell you why not! I LOVE MY FUCKING CIGGIE BUTTS - boo hoo......I think I'm gonna have to go to a psych ward or detox place - where they DON'T take ciggy breaks every hour!! So seeing as I was down to my last pack and being as glum as possible, I headed to Wal-Fart for some more hair dye -another sign that things are askew:) and asked my "usual express line less than happy to be there cashier" for the CHEAPEST cigarettes they had! I'm a creature of habit - I will drive across town just to get MY brand. I am now the proud smoker of USA GOLD Menthol Lights, kinda like drinking out of a brown bag. PROBLEM has been bandaged. Mike said he would rather pay for me to go to Florida to get some new "shot" (oh, I'm sure it works......) to quit.
So this may be the year.....no pressure please - just throwin it out there, no intervention needed - YET! But I'm kinda thinking detox sounds tempting - great place to make friends!
Ok, I think I have been in shock all week. I have been thinking non-stop about the whole ciggie cost thing. OMG! I feel like a fucking junky who know's where her next fix is but doesn't have anything to left pawn. Kinda sounds like "rock bottom" but there is no rocky bottom in the river D'Nile!! Instead, I shouted out to all my dealers (fag ash lil friends) to find out the low down on who's going to the Indian Reservation? North Carolina? South of the Border? And how many cartons can I get? Oh, oh, and can I use my coupons! My friend B is not only going to keep my up to date on the cig runs (brings Christopher Multisante to mind!) but we are going to start "walking" a few days aweek and have promised ourselves NOT to smoke while we walk.......baby steps, baby steps!
1 comments:
I will not utter a word not hold my breath...except when the ciggie smoke is around....
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